We are searching data for your request:
Upon completion, a link will appear to access the found materials.
Many children go through a terrible phase of tantrums. Others are simply short-tempered and often uncover the anger box. And since they are still small, they do not know how to handle it correctly. And it is that anger is one of those liberating and at the same time harmful emotions, elusive and fast, that sweeps, awakens and hits.
The great problem of many parents is that they block themselves, or they try to solve the problem with more violence. And the whirlwind of anger spreads further. Problem no. resolved. Do you really want to know how you can help your child curb that emotion? Write down these 11 phrases to calm an angry child ... and see if they work.
You have heard all about secret formulas to stop a tantrum in time. Or tactics and more tactics to fight them. You will have written fascinating tricks to curb anger. But we often forget the most important thing: communication. The words that are used are often more important, because a word can be, at the right moment, like an antidote, like a caress or like a light.
Words can be magic. Also the tone in which they are pronounced. When you are angry and someone gives you a few words of encouragement or words of solidarity, of accompaniment, doesn't your face change? Try to do the same with your child when he is angry. We give you ideas. Write down these 11 phrases to calm an angry child ... and see if they work:
1. 'Older people also get very angry, but we have another way of expressing it.' Empathize with your child. He feels very angry about something and has the right to vent, but not in that way, not like this. Instead of saying phrases like: 'Older people don't do that!' 'You look like a baby with that tantrum!', He chooses phrases that make him understand that anger is a natural feeling that adults also have but that he has to learn to express anger in another way, with a drawing, an exercise in breathing ... you have many possible techniques!
2. 'You can get mad at your brother, but it's not okay to hurt him'. When a child hits his brother or another child, we often push him away, scold him and even 'spank' him. What will you understand? That his anger, which he expressed violently, is punished with more anger (that of our anger). You cannot escape your anger, you will not understand what to do if it happens again. What in that case we have to do is say to him: 'You can't do that. I understand that you are angry because there is something that bothered you, but you must not hurt it, because we must never hurt others. ' Don't be afraid to use No. What's more: you need to use No. This way your child will understand that this way of expressing anger is not correct, although it is logical that he feels angry.
3. 'Why do you throw away your toys? Did you get mad at them? Don't you want to play with them? '. Many children, when they get angry, begin to throw everything in their reach. In a fit of rage, they end up throwing everything they can to the ground. The most normal thing is that you get very angry and yell at your child: 'Don't throw things on the ground!' This only makes the situation worse. Your child does not understand why he is so angry and throws things without wanting to do so. You need someone to slow you down by making you think about what you are doing. The best thing is that you change your cry for a 'Why are you throwing things on the ground? Are you mad at them? ' This will make your child think that he is not really mad at his toys, and that he could play with them instead of throwing them away.
4. 'Let's find a solution together to make it work for you'. When your child becomes frustrated because he can't do something he wanted to do, he may end up crying out of frustration. Frustration leads to anger and anger to tantrum. If at that point you say things like 'You didn't try hard enough!' or 'Well, try again and stop crying!', he will think that you do not value his effort and that crying is wrong when he feels bad. No. Let him be frustrated. It's good for him. And help him understand that he can always get it, that you trust him. At that moment, what your child needs are words of encouragement and confidence: 'Of course you are going to get it, let's try again'. If you get involved and help, your child will renew his strength and also gain confidence in himself.
5. 'Let's both calm down'. Hasn't it happened to you that being in a place with more people your son has started screaming and kicking and your anger, together with that embarrassing situation, has increased? At that moment you feel as much fury as your son, so many times you will end up shouting a: 'It's all right, get out of here!', At the same time that you grab your son by the arm to remove him from all eyes. Actually, what your child needs is to feel understood. If you surprise him with: 'Okay, I understand you, and I'm angry too, so let's both calm down', he will feel that he is not alone, and that you can help him.
6. 'What if we start tidying your room around this corner?' Many times children get frustrated because they see the tasks we entrust them with as 'impossible'. When we ask them to clean their entire room, tidy up the whole room ... for them it is suddenly a world and they feel overwhelmed. Therefore, instead of threatening them with a: 'You are not going to leave your room until everything is collected', we can present the task in a more 'accessible' way for them. In this way, you will be able to anticipate his tantrum and stop it. Use phrases like: 'You have to organize all this ... how about you start in that corner there?'
7. 'How can we make food like you more?' It is not about cooking to your liking and always doing what he wants. When a child does not want to eat a certain dish, the worst thing we can do is force him, because that will only make him more angry. Phrases like: 'Eat that right now!' or 'If you don't finish everything, you will have it for dinner', they only make him more angry. If instead you ask him to find a solution, with a phrase like: 'Tell me how you could like it better', you will be inviting your son to find a reasonable solution for both of you, so that he will end up eating what you prepared but with some light change.
8. 'And what do you need to be ready to go?' In the case of those children who do not want to leave the house and even kick to get you to stay ... It is best to leave them without arguments, with phrases like: 'Tell me what you need to go out'. You can offer options: 'Your favorite doll?' 'So you're ready?' On the contrary, avoid resorting to imposing phrases such as: 'Either you go out right now or I punish you'. It is a threat that does not solve the problem at all.
9. 'If you repeat it to me in a normal tone, I will understand you.' When a child projects his anger by screaming, they get on our nerves. Avoid yelling with phrases like, 'Don't yell!' There is no point yelling at whoever is yelling to stop yelling, don't you think? In this case, you can opt for a: 'If you yell at me, I can't understand it. 'Will you repeat it to me, please? But slowly and smaller ... '
10. 'Maybe you didn't listen to me. Do I repeat it to you and you repeat it to see if you understand? '. When a child seems that 'he does not want to hear', and you have to repeat things many times, it is normal for you to lose patience and end up shouting: 'But how many times do I have to repeat it to you ?!' Instead, seek to involve your child. It is your responsibility to listen. Try a: 'I'm going to repeat it slowly and I want you to repeat it with me to make sure you heard and understood it well.'
11. 'You are very angry, very angry. What if I give you a 'scared' hug? ' When a child is angry and does not know why, he ends up erupting in a tantrum that completely overwhelms him. What you are asking at that moment is someone to tell you what is wrong with you. You can make the mistake of scolding him and yelling at him: 'You're unbearable!' 'No one can put up with you!' Or try to solve it in a more reasonable way by offering a solution to his anger: a big hug. 'Come, I think I have the solution to your super anger: a big hug!
There are many ways to appease anger. But violence and yelling are never a good option. Yes it is affection, understanding, hugs, kisses. Love. Your child is asking you (loudly, but he is asking you), empathy, and in a way, help to understand what is happening to him. Help him with inspiring phrases, offering him responsibility, encouraging him to seek solutions, to delve into what caused his anger ... With your help, he will be able to overcome it.
You can read more articles similar to 11 phrases to calm an angry child ... that work!, in the category of Conduct on site.
